


Nicknames and Memories

by Ineffablemurderhusbands



Series: memories and reencounters [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-08 05:04:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18887731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ineffablemurderhusbands/pseuds/Ineffablemurderhusbands
Summary: The Doctor makes a trip down memory lane as she remembers her old nicknames. And the people behind them.





	Nicknames and Memories

“So, where are we off to, Doc?” Graham asked in an excited voice as he stuffed sandwiches inside his coat’s pockets in case he got hungry. Graham’s motto lately was “Improvise. Adapt. Overcome” and so far it was working. 

The Doctor stopped what she was doing and froze in place with a faraway look on her face and her hand on the lever. Graham, Yaz and Ryan glanced at each other worriedly at her expression. “Doc?” Graham called in a concerned tone of voice and the Doctor shook her head like she was ridding herself from her thoughts. 

“Are you ok?” Yaz asked, placing a hand on the Doctor’s shoulder lightly. 

“Yes.” She gave a tiny hesitant smile, looking like she wasn’t actually sure if she was fine. “It’s just that I was assaulted with a thought all of a sudden and was not prepared for it.” 

“What is it, Doc?” Graham asked. 

“That.” She smiled at him, this time softly. “You calling me Doc.” 

“You don’t like it?” Ryan asks. 

“Quite the contrary, actually. I think it’s brilliant!” She exclaimed. 

“Then why do you look so sad?” Yaz asked. 

“It’s just that it’s been a while since I had a nickname of sorts.” She explained. “And then I remembered the people that used to have nicknames for me.” The Doctor sighed forlornly. “And then remembered that they’re all gone.” 

“I’m sorry, Doc-tor.” Graham stopped himself before he called her “Doc”. 

“No, Graham… Don’t stop calling me, Doc, please.” She pleaded. “I really do love it.” 

“Maybe you can tell us about them, Doc.” He said and she sighed, nodding faintly. 

“I’ve had many monikers, aliases and nicknames over the centuries.” She started. “I’ve been called the Oncoming Storm and the Destroyer of Worlds by enemies, called myself John Smith many times but there’s something about someone that you care for giving you a nickname that’s special.” The Doctor smiled. “My best friend used to call me Theta Sigma back home in Gallifrey.” 

“Gallifrey?” Ryan frowned. 

“Yes, that’s my home planet.” She said. “My best friend was also kind of my arch nemesis.” She frowned. “He called himself the Master and then the Mistress, Missy for short. I always believed they could change for the better someday and I was so sure that Missy was becoming a better person… I guess I was wrong.” She released a heavy breath, like it pained her greatly. 

“What happened?” Yaz asked. 

“In the end she turned on me with the male version of herself.” The Doctor sighs. 

“I’m confused.” Ryan mutters. 

“It’s a long story.” She says and moves on. The companions decided not to ask anymore more questions about that. “Then there was Amelia. She used to call me Raggedy Man because when she met me I had just regenerated into Chinny and was wearing tattered clothes. Amy used to call me a Madman with a box as well.” She chuckled sadly. “I miss the Ponds a lot.” 

“The Ponds?” Graham asked. 

“Amy Pond and her husband, Rory.” She clarified. “They liked to tell me that they were actually called the Williams but honestly the name never stuck. They used to travel with me, my chosen family so to speak.” 

“What happened to them?” Ryan asked.

“They ended up living a full life together in Manhattan but I could never see them again.” She ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “And neither did River.” 

“Who is River?” Yaz asked. 

“River is…” She sighed deeply. “A lot of things.” She chuckled. “Their daughter.” She paused with a pained look on her face, gulping down dry before she continued in a lighter tone. “But also a professor in archeology, a doctor, hell in high heels, a criminal and assassin. One of the smartest and cleverer people I know. Also incredibly gorgeous and kind.” Then the Doctor smiled fondly, her hazel-green eyes twinkling beneath the TARDIS amber lights. “But mostly my wife.” The Doctor didn’t give them time to ask her anything before she was talking again. “River used to call me sweetie and eventually that became the way we recognized each other.” She sighed. “Sometimes I think I can hear her voice saying it but when I look around she’s not there.” The Doctor whispered so low that it was hard to make out the words. 

They didn’t need to ask her this time what had happened to her. The haunted look in the Doctor’s eyes told them every bit of the story they needed to know. 

“I’m sorry, Doctor.” Yaz said, putting her arm around the Doctor’s shoulders and hugging her sideways. 

“The worst of it is that I still hope that I’m going to see her again someday, even if I know it’s impossible.” She says. “I live the impossible everyday so it isn’t a stretch to have hope in this.” The Doctor shrugs. “If there’s someone who can come back from the dead in heels and red lipstick, that person is River, trust me.” She smiles and the TARDIS makes a sound. “Oh yeah sexy, there’s you!” The Doctor said excitedly, shrugging off Yaz’s arm and walking towards the console table, stroking it lightly. Yaz tried not to feel offended. “You have a nickname for me too!” The TARDIS makes another noise and the Doctor looks offended for a moment. “I had forgotten that they are a bit offensive if fond.” 

“What does the TARDIS calls you, Doc?” Graham asked, genuinely curious. 

“She calls me her Thief and her Beautiful Idiot.” She says, glaring at the ceiling fondly. “

“Why does she call you a thief?” Ryan asks. 

“I did kind of steal her.” She shrugs, looking sheepish. “It’s a long story!” She warned before they could open their mouths. “Anyways, Graham’s nickname for me took me a little down memory lane.” She says, like she hadn’t just told them important and personal stuff about her lives to them. “To answer your question Graham, we are going to Paris in the 30’s!” She pulled the lever down and the TARDIS started shaking and making her usual sounds. “Let’s get out shift on!”

The three of them glanced at each other and made a silent vow to not touch the subject again with her for the duration of this travel, not wanting to see the Doctor look sad again. But the subject would not stay silent for long since they would be meeting both River and Missy that same day in Paris.

**Author's Note:**

> It always pained me that the Doctor didn't know that Missy was on his side in the end. 
> 
>  
> 
> I have no ideia if I'm going to write them meeting in Paris, the fic was supposed to end up here. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy. Please leave kudos and comments if you do.


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